The rise of freedom

Now, your at the 'film' night. You've been driven back safely by the getaway driver and you have your prise. A broiler chicken.
Here comes the long part; giving your chicken a fulfilled and active life. Now i hope you remembered to build that chicken coop somewhere outside and away from evil family members? You didn't...you did what...in your backgarden under the window? Well now everyone knows you stole the 'missing' chicken.
Anyway, put the chicken in the coop and ensure it has plenty of green green grass to walk around on. Give it a bowl of fresh water and let them eat all the bugs and whatever in your garden. Also leftover food is good, but in small amounts.

The Raid!

Yes, so today...or tonight rather, is when your first plan your brainchild to liberate a 'poor' chicken will commence. Dont forget to tell your unknowing and enslaved ( by the thoughts of buying broiler chicken produce ) family members of friends that yes tonight you are once again attending your film club. But to put off any people who may suddenly want to come. Say that, instead of watching a comedy, we'll be watching 'Schindler's List' while going over a "very" in-depth plot overview and may be gone for several hours. Questions such as "Where?" and "Why?" may be answered with in Bill's attick you know the 'soundproofed' one. And we got bored of comedies.

Step 8: So after leaving the poor misguided family behind ( remember you can liberate thier minds ). Meet up with the loyal, dedicated people in the "Chicken Liberation Group", ensuring that you have all the equipment stashed away, in your vehicle(s). Oh make sure your choice of vehicle has a large amount of storage space. e.g. a van.

Step 9: Drive up the road closest to the S.O.D. and park up inconspicuously. Now Teams 1 and 2 exit the vehicle(s) while the remainder of the group set up the communication station in the van. Team 1 finds adequate cover, while Team 2 spreads out to key locations for the best view of what is happening.

Step 10: After all people are in place team 1 can move in, guided by real time intel from Team 2. ( Note: keep in contact over the radios. Communication is your friend ). So team 1 is now inside the S.O.D. good. move quickly and efficiently to secure the chicken(s) you want to save and get out (G.O.).

Step 11: Wait for Team 2 to give the all clear and move out of the S.O.D. and the farm. Re-group at the van and with that gettaway driver at the wheel(s) DRIVE DRIVE DRIVE!

The Hard Part

So, the seasoned rescuers among you may be wondering where the hard part arises. So far its been moderately dificult not to look like a fool infront of your friends and the farmer. Well now here are the next three steps:

Step 5: After returning from the farm...or evil chicken torture centre, dig out that list of things you'll need to overcome the problems. Create a shopping list and divide it up between the group members, one or two items each. Now use several different stores, D.I.Y shack's...whatever as not to attract attention. (Note: It's even better if one of your group works in a shop where that person can create a stockpile for you). Now you have everything you need.

Step 6: Decide who is going to go into the shed and liberate the chicken(s). I recommend 2 teams:

Team 1 goes into the S.O.D. (Shed Of Death) and locates and liberates the chicken(s). About 2-3 people MAX in this group)

Team 2 monitors the farm house and updates Team 1 with what is happening. e.g. (plotting evil guard movements to ensure Team 1 isn't captured for 'questioning'). About 6-7 people MAX depending on the size of the farm and S.O.D.

If however there are a few people left over, here are a few important tasks they could handle.

1. A gettaway driver, a reckless individual, with speeding tickets
2. An escort, a well built quieter person, to bring Team 1 back to base from insde the S.O.D.
3. A communication centre and advanced lookout station to watch roads and traffic

Step 7: Now wait a few weeks as not to draw attention. Attend the movie night and be cautious of any spies or double agents in your group, who may be working with the Evil Chicken Trapper (ECT).

Remember to read through all of these steps before begining your liberation campaign, or you may turn up at the E.C.T 's door not knowing where you are, or how to save the poor chickens.

How to start a liberation!

(Note: this is just a comical idea. DO NOT do this and dont blame it on me if you do and get arrested. This is for fun)


Okay, so this goes out to anybody out there who has ever thought about liberating a 'poor', 'defenseless' chicken, from an evil broiler house.
It acurred to me several of years ago, when I was back in high school, when our class was asked to create a poster against the containment of chickens in small cages that, maybe, just maybe i could liberate a broiler chicken to star in a movie. (a comedy obviously).

The first four steps to liberating a chicken:

1. Get together a group of people to help you. It helps if: A. You know them quite well. B. They want to liberate a chicken from the evil chicken trapper. (this saves time later)
2. Arrange an evening where everyone is free, to sit down and watch a comedy together. While discussing who will keep the chicken, who will feed it...ect. (this is very important as explaine later)
3. Get a computer thats conected to the internet, and browse free map sites or journey planners, which use satellite imaging to find a suspicious looking shed or barn in your local area.
4. Use the evening arranged in Step 2 as a cover up, while you drive to the shed...sorry, evil chicken prison, and do a preliminary survey of the layout of the land around the shed. Now make a list of any obsticles you may have to overcome e.g. (barbed wire). Think of it like a shopping list except its to free a poor trapped chicken. Balaclavas are not vital, but are recommended. So are in-ear walky talkies, to communicate. (NOTE: A grappling hook and zip-line are NOT RECOMMENDED)